just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
