She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
