I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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