My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
