Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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