the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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