I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
