are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize