Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Boobs are out for the taking
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
