Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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