im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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