doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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