come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
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i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
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it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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