party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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