I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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