Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
