i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
