i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
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