he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
