Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
