with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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