Pappa wants mamma naked
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Randomize