fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.