How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
