all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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