But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
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