I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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