her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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