Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
