took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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