wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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