Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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