He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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