Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
