Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
