Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
