I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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