K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
