I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
