My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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