I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize