she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize
