Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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