I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
