so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
