Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Randomize
