i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
