Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Operation Purity has been aborted
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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