you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
