): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
My feet surprised me
Randomize
