I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
