Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
